Day 601 – Warts and All

kssing fromgs

It has to be said, dating post divorce means kissing a hell of a lot of frogs. A veritable swamp load if you will. You can’t always tell the level of froginess they will possess from the outset and so dating, particularly internet dating, requires one to wade through the spectrum from cane toad to Kermit, with no guarantee of a princely outcome.

I once went out with a man who enquired as to whether I was “authentically white” like him. This is a question I’d never been asked before, nor since but apparently my being an olive skinned brunette with brown eyes made him feel I might be pretending to be white, which was a deal breaker for that racist frog.

Then there was the chap who double dipped his mini spring roll into the chilli sauce and was very rude to a young waitress at a Thai restaurant. He was most put out when I told him I didn’t think we should see each other again.  It may seem such a little thing but I cannot abide rudeness to waitstaff for no other reason than that they are waitstaff.

Two separate fellows turned up very obviously having partaken of some Dutch courage prior to meeting me. One slurred his words and kept losing track of the conversation, the other told me, when discussing pets, that he only liked big cats. When I snorted and asked “like tigers and lions?” he replied yes, with an absolute straight face. Both smelled so potently of alcohol I could almost see the fumes coming off them.

There was a chap who told me I lived too far away from him to start a relationship but he would consider having sex with me (as a one off) that afternoon and the man who didn’t speak, at all, unless I spoke first.

There was the broken hearted fellow, still desperately in love with his former wife of 20 years who kept referring to his former marital abode as “home” and the one who was still married. Actually I suspect there was more than one who was still married.

The finding of a prince is of course a fairytale and I have no illusions of being “rescued” nor do I desire it. I just really want to meet someone who is funny and kind and handsome and who has come to be aware of and accepting of their own faults, who thinks I am funny and kind and pretty and will be accepting of me and what I have to offer, warts and all.

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